Dr. Robert Melillo

(excerpts from www.drrobertmelillo.com) Dr. Robert Melillo has been helping children overcome learning disabilities for over 20 years. His areas of expertise include: autism spectrum disorders, PDD/NOS, ADD/ADHD, OCD, dyslexia, Asperger's, Tourette's, bipolar disorder, and other mental, attention, behavioral and learning disorders. He is also and expert in diet, nutrition and neuroimmune disorders in children and adults. He is a chiropractic physician who also holds a masters of science degree in neuroscience as well as a diplomat certification in functional neurology. He also lectures extensively to other doctors across the United States and Europe to include many medical neurologists (MD's).

 Available at Amazon.com

In 2004, Dr. Melillo published Neurobehavioral Disorders of Childhood: An Evolutionary Perspective, a working theory textbook on developmental disabilities. This book continues to be utilized on both a graduate and undergraduate level in Universities around the world, it has been translated into Korean and Chinese.

 Available at Amazon.com

However, it was Dr. Melillo's best-selling 2009 book, Disconnected Kids that catapulted him to national prominence. Greeted with overwhelming positive response. Dr. Melillo's leadership in the field, as well as his personal dedication to the creation of a drug-free multi-modal educational program for children with ADD/ADHD, dyslexia, Asperger's, and autism spectrum disorders, have made him one of the most sought-after speakers on the subject today, both in the U.S. and abroad. Disconnected Kids has been translated into Chinese, Korean and Hebrew and there are French and Italian versions being completed now. He just completed the second edition of Disconnected Kids, which was released in March of 2015.

   Available at Amazon.com

Dr. Melillo deserves a standing ovation! I respect and admire individuals like him who've chosen to dedicate a large part of their lives to helping us all to better understand the different causes and effects of living with a number of mental disabilities.


Reconnected Kids also Available at Amazon.com

 You'll also find insightful blogs at his website. One in particular that I found interesting was the one entitled Dr. Melillo’s Holiday Shopping List for Kids with Autism. dr-melillo-holiday-shopping-list-kids-autism
Due to sensory integration issues, children with autism and other neurobehavioral disorders of childhood have special regulatory needs. A variety of therapy toys and sensory tools have been developed to help to minimize stress, reduce the occurrence of meltdowns and help children with special needs cope with sensory challenges. In fact, these are perfect gifts for any occasion.

Currently Dr. Melillo is working on the MelilloChallenge

 

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A Zest for Spelling

By the time my son reached 5th grade, he had an extensive vocabulary. His comprehension of most words had increased as well. That year, he participated in his classroom spelling bee and won! Winning the class spelling bee guaranteed him a spot in the school wide spelling bee.

I was proud and nervous and the same time. Proud because I knew how far he had come and how hard he had worked to reach this point. I was nervous because this was his first time ever having to speak in front of a large crowd. I was worried about how the crowd would react to his speech and quirkiness. I was also nervous about my reaction if that happened and how we both would feel afterwards. I talked with my son that evening. I wanted to know how he felt and if he was ready to participate in what would be a big event to him. To my surprise, he was ecstatic! His happiness and excitement overshadowed my feelings of doubt and worry. So every evening until the big day, I helped him study and prepare. We went over the rules and what was to be expected of all participants. Finally the big day had arrived! I made sure we had a good breakfast and that he was dressed nicely. He assured me that he was ready and so was I. The audience was filled with family and friends of spelling bee participants, along with 4th and 5th grade classes, teachers, faculty and staff.

I decided to bring two of my son’s biggest cheerleaders with me, his little sister and my best friend. After saying the pledge and listening to the opening announcements, it was time for the spelling bee to begin. One by one each amazing student bravely stood in front of an audience and spelled the word they were given.

Of course, some students spelled their given word correctly and some did not. At last, it was my son’s turn. As soon as he approached the microphone I immediately heard snickering from fellow students in the crowd. This angered me! Yet, when I looked at my son on stage he seemed to be unfazed. He was given his first word and he nailed it! Round after round went by and he didn’t misspell one word. At this point, he and others were spelling words that I misspelled in my head as they were called. As a matter of fact, he was the only student that asked for a word to be used tin a sentence. My son ended up being one of the last two participants left on stage. They were both 5th graders. The final word given to my son was sombrero. Unfortunately, he misspelled it. However, he would have gotten another shot at a different word if the other participant misspelled his given word. The last student approached the microphone and was given the last and final word to spell. He spelled it correctly, thus winning the school spelling bee. That winning word was zest. Trophies were not given that year to spelling bee participants. However, I was so proud that I went out and had one made. 

Chivalry Is NOT Dead

I’ve heard doctors tell myself and other parents of autistic children that the possibility of them being able to properly express and comprehend emotion was slim to none. Boy were they wrong! I’ve had numerous stories shared with me proving the contrary and my son was no exception. This particular story was shared with me by one of his counselors at the time. I believe my son was around 9 or 10 years old when this occurred. A new student was placed in his classroom during the middle of that school year. This young lady was not only new to the school but she was also new to the state! One day, she expressed to their teacher that she felt out of place. She hadn’t made any new friends and was having a hard time adjusting. That afternoon, right before lunch, my son walked over to her desk and extended his hand! In a shy manner, he asked if he could walk with her lunch. She accepted and he escorted her.

Although he never ate the school lunch, he sat with her and escorted her back to class afterwards. From then on, she referred to him as her boyfriend.

I was so tickled and delighted. They were lunch buddies for the rest of that school year. I’m so proud my son is a person who listens and responds to an individual in need with kindness.

The Little Sibling that Could

My son was 7 yrs old by the time I had my daughter. One of my biggest concerns at the time was whether or not he would resent having a new baby sibling around. However, my concerns were quickly put to rest the day I brought her home. The minute he laid eyes on his tiny little sister, he became a very loving big brother. He was always willing to help with feedings, diaper changes and entertaining. He was an expert at making her laugh. He enjoyed holding her too. His actions showed me that he really loved his little sister.

Let’s fast-forward about two to three years later. That tiny and precious baby girl had now transformed into a playful, sassy toddler. Every chance she got to be in her brother’s face or space, she would take it. This really bothered my son. Most days she would annoy him so much that he had to do the one thing he wasn’t very good at; talk! I would hear him saying phrases like, “get on my nerves,” to “get her out,” or “make her stop.” At a time when my son barely spoke, hearing those phrases were like music to my ears. She MADE him talk! Really, she left him with no other options. She changed our lives forever.

The Power of His Voice

I had a handful of cousins growing up. Our ages ranged like stair steps, and we loved each other like brothers and sisters. One day John, a teenage cousin of ours, made an awful decision. He decided to ride along with a group of his peers in a stolen car! Needless to say, they were pulled over by the police a few short joyrides later.

At the time, my oldest brother was a deputy sheriff. This worked out in Cousin John’s favor. Along with the fact that he had no prior criminal record, he was released into the custody of my brother. My house was the closest to the scene therefore, that’s where most of us cousins gathered to have words with John. Needless to say, tempers escalated quickly. John was trying to explain his side of the story, yet none of us wanted to hear his excuses. It was borderline chaotic in the living room that evening, with what seemed to be no end in sight. Luckily, something did happen to bring an end to the uproar. Something no one, including me, ever expected to happen! My son, who may have been 6 or 7 yrs old at the time, came out of his room and into the living room. He walked to the middle of the floor and shouted, “Wait, wait maybe Cousin John has something to say!” His words brought our state of disorder to a screeching halt. For about ten seconds you could hear a pin drop. Then something amazing happened. We All Laughed! We laughed so hard we all were in tears.

All it took was the voice of the youngest individual present, who rarely spoke, to put an end to our dysfunction. To this day, if one of us says that phrase to the other, there’s instant laughter. I’ll always remember that day as the day HIS voice and HIS words were the calm to our storm.  PS Cousin John has never been in any trouble since!!

Opposition Teacher Pt 2

Needless to say, I was overwhelmed with negative emotions. Anger, frustration, confusion, you name it and I may have experienced it at that time.

To express that ANY child wanting an education was beneath receiving it was downright shameful in my opinion. I knew I had to do more than be angry to remedy this situation. I reached out to other parents and counselors who reminded me of an important fact that I was forgetting. My son’s IEP was law! As long as it was locked, or agreed upon and signed by all in attendance, it was equivalent to classroom law! What a relief it was knowing my son would still have his opportunity. Both of us were up for the challenge, which was good because it was far from easy. Weekly tests, essays, projects, and oral reports were the norm in this classroom. History and Spelling became two of his favorite subjects. The fact that historical dates and the spelling of words never changed made them easy things for him to remember. Once he had something memorized, it was with him for life! Oral reports and essays were not as easy for him to complete. As I have mentioned before, one of his problem areas was verbal communication. To help with this issue, he and I would practice his oral reports while standing in front of a mirror. This paid off tremendously! Once every word and sound was put to memory, he had no problem reciting it in class.

Unfortunately he would lose points for his handwriting as it was terrible at that time. He would also lose point during the verbal question and answer period that followed each student’s oral report. Even with the point deductions, he still received a passing score on these assignments. Along with a stellar memory, my son possessed another very important quality that seemed to be lacking in his generation. He had the ability to behave himself! My son was becoming a person who preferred order, stability and schedule over chaos. For example, if there was a substitute teacher in the class, he would usually be the only student choosing to behave.

The rest of the class would be unruly. His self-control was one way he ended up turning that teacher from a non-believer into a cheerleader! Not only was he well behaved, he came to school every day prepared and eager to learn.

He was a teacher’s dream come true. He definitely passed the 4th grade, but not before showing one opposition teacher how NOT to judge a book by its cover.

ASAN=Autistic Self Advocacy Network

Did you know that there is a nonprofit organization run by and for autistic people? Well there is, and it’s called The Autistic Self Advocacy Network or ASAN. One of their many goals is to ensure that the autistic communities have a voice in what has definitely become a national conversation about their lives. This group of brilliantly organized individuals advocates specific policy position on issues of importance to autistic people and others with disabilities. ASAN members include autistic adults and youth, cross disability advocates, non-autistic family members, professionals and friends.

May I just say how overjoyed I was when I came across this site. To know that it’s not only for but run by individuals with autism filled me with pride. Again, thinking back to the 90’s when my son was first diagnosed; advocacy groups were seldom heard of or just didn’t exist! Now there’s a plethora of amazing groups, networks and sites including the ASAN right at your fingertips. www.autisticadvocacy.org

Ari Ne’eman, co-founder of the Autistic Self Advocacy Network https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/magazine/just-asking-ari-neeman-co-founder-of-the-autistic-self-advocacy-network/2015/03/05/ccb87f44-b2e1-11e4-854b-a38d13486ba1_story.html