Ta Va pt.2 (Don’t say that)

I remember having the first of many meetings with an evaluation team to discuss my son. An evaluation team may include the students’ parents or guardian, teacher, assistant teacher, counselor, coach and psychologist. My son’s biggest weakness was his ability to communicate so we started there. I told the “ta va” tale to the group in hopes of positive feedback. However, that’s not what I received. I was told not to encourage made up words like “ta va” because that would hinder him in life. Now of course my plan was NOT to have him use made up words for his entire life! But the fact that he was trying to communicate brought me so much joy. After listening to this group of so called experts on the subject, I remember leaving the meeting feeling like a failure. I also remember thinking to myself why it is that they can offer advice on what NOT to do, but nothing much to say as far as what TO do.

The 1st Dentist Visit

My son was about 4yrs old at this time and although he hadn’t been “labeled” I still knew he was quite different. It was a sensitive subject for me, and I’ll explain. My son, like most autistic individuals, was very sensitive to touch. That goes double for strangers. I took him to the dentist which was needed at this time. He was called to the back when it was his turn. No more than 15mins later the dentist calls me to the back. He asked me “is there something wrong with your boy?” I immediately took offense and asked him to explain. He could tell that I was getting upset so he changed his tone but his next question wasn’t any better. “What I mean is, is he slow?” Now the word “slow“ infuriates me when used to describe my son. So yes, I lost it and no I’m not proud of that. He eventually explained that because my son wouldn’t let anyone touch him or even sit still that he would have to use a method of strapping him down to get the work done. A big part of me wanted to grab my son and run as far as we could out of there, but I couldn’t. He really needed the work done. I agreed and had to watch my son strapped to a table in discomfort and I was torn. How could something as simple as a dental visit turn into this? 

No Shot for this Tot

There was one thing more sensitive than touch to my son and that was pain. Once he could walk and then run, a trip to the doctor’s office became a mini marathon up and down the hallway. One day I decided to bring my brother along. I explained to him that his nephew was scheduled for a shot so this wasn’t going to be easy. Fast forward to the three of us waiting in the room for the nurse to come in with the needle. I told my brother to hold him tight because he’s very strong when he’s afraid. My brother assured me that he had everything under control. In walks the nurse, who was already familiar with my son, so she knew she had to act fast. When she rubbed his arm with the alcohol, he started trying his best to break free. When she leaned in with the needle, somehow my son broke away from my brother. He then took the needle from the nurse, stuck my brother with it and ran out the door down the hallway!! HILARIOUS!! Of course I immediately retrieved my son and he did have to get his shot. But he definitely left us with one heck of a story to tell for years to come 