Lover Not A Fighter

Public school was very difficult at times for my son. The fact that he couldn’t communicate like most children sometimes made him an easy target. There was no shortage of verbal abuse and humiliation hurled his way from some students. Some days it would even be physical. One day, I got so fed up with hearing from teachers what my son had to endure, I made a tough decision. I decided to teach him how to defend himself. That evening I made my young son stand in the middle of our living room floor. I talked to him about self-defense and how important it was for him to learn and know. His response to me was a blank stare. So I put both of my hands up and told him to throw a punch.

He shook his head no in response. I started to wonder if he understood what I was asking him to do and why. I asked him again to throw a punch and again he shook his head no in response! At that point, I had yet to understand what he was saying to me without using any words. Feeling frustrated, I began to cry. I raised my voice and repeated my speech on how important self-defense was. I even reached for his hand to show him how to make a fist. He pulled away and started to cry with me. It was then that I understood what he couldn’t verbally say at the time. He was a lover not a fighter. Although the torment he endured in school at times wasn’t enough for him to feel the need to retaliate, (yet) there was NOTHING I could do to make him hit ME. Even if it was just a lesson, he wasn’t doing it. I hugged him, kissed him, told him how much I love him and apologized repeatedly. His response was a hug, a kiss and laughter. At the end of our night right before bed, I asked him if he could make me a promise. I asked him to promise me that if ever he was in trouble and he needed me, he would holler loud enough so that I could come running. He shook his head yes. 